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2003-07-16 + 5:54 p.m.
Work huh, cant live with it, can live with out it, its strange how the people i work with seem to resemble the work i actually do, if you try an be creative it just doesnt cut it, it comes back to you as an error. So you have to accomodate your procedure to fit in, you have to act like a moron, you have to hide any absract thought, you have to keep your mouth shut an stick to the well trodden plan. Theres people i work with that i talk to, if i don tell them the answer they want to hear they pretend like i havent said anything, the conversation ends until i get back to the 'middle of the road' subject, i spoke to one of my bosses, she asked me why i have been makeing mistakes recently, i told her it was because i was bored an couldnt concentrate, she told me that was a poor excuse, i told her it was an honest excuse an pretty valid, she then proceded to tell me i had better knuckle down. Oh yes thats right i forgot id better knuckle down, problem solved.Jesus christ!.wednesday Barbara seems to have disappered into the ether sorting out her problems trying to make amends, i am happy for her an i wish her well, although i have to be honest it annoys me a little the fact she just comes an goes. The fact that she made the effort to try again with me, i was scared to do this but i was willing to give it a shot, she then went cold on me an i felt like i was in her face an pushing her. Now she is reconciling with her husband, im glad she is, i honestly do hope they will work out, but the reasons she gave me for us not working out seem to closely resemble the reasons she is getting annoyed with him, his vagueness,his fear of commiting ect. I guess i wish she had just gotten with him before she aroused my emotions once again, i dont blame her for anything as the 'love' game is hard for anyone and consider her a good and close friend but it would of made things a lot easier for me. |